AUBREEVISION - Observations from the far side of the dial

Have you ever had a sugar craving so intense that it practically brings you to your knees? I've been shovelling my grubhole full of sorbet in an effort to drown my sugar yearnings with a remedy that, while no broccoli, could be a lot worse on the junk scale. What would really float my bloat would be a heavenly cocktail of Swedish berries, Cherry Blasters, and Bridge Mix on a bed of chocolate soft-serve, smothered with an avalanche of caramel and garnished with two perfect nuclear-red maraschino cherries. As a personal-trainer-in-training, you can see my dilemma -- if not my abs. Sigh...