AUBREEVISION - Observations from the far side of the dial

Happy to be back at the homestead, showered and nestled in my comfort sweater. My trip home from work was a series of aggravations. Firstly, the gym's alarm system wonked out and the boss had to come to my rescue. Secondly, it must have been a full moon or my creep-magnet tendencies were peaking, because I had my pick of two. Thirdly, the bus situation was pathetic -- thank you, municipal budget cuts. Had to wait 20 minutes for the main cross-city bus, which in the good ol' days ran much more frequently; and when it finally showed up, it was a standard bus stuffed to the gills, rather than the double-long typically used on that route. It was so full, in fact, that the bus driver wouldn't take any more passengers, which meant a return to the waiting game. But hey, at least I got to spend more quality time with Creep 1, who tried to chat me up while we waited. His chatter was pretty inane but he gave me a weird feeling -- the Creepdar was hovering on Bloody Likely.

When we finally got on the bus, Creep 1 stared holes into my face. When I finally got to my transfer point, damned if he didn't change buses right along with me. At that point Creep 2 came into the picture; as soon as I sat down beside him he launched into the "you look familiar" dance, asking increasingly personal questions. When I finally reached my stop, Creep 2 was asking if I speak French and Creep 1 was trying to join the conversation with stories of his auto mechanic days.

Once I got off the bus I kept looking behind to make sure neither had followed me. They hadn't, though a shifty-looking lamppost made me look twice. Then, just as I had crossed the street and started to relax, I heard someone yelling "Excuse me! Excuse me!" from a car at the intersection. I turned around and, given my run of bad luck, braced myself for harassment; I was shocked by a polite request for directions.

Creeps 1 and 2 might have been perfectly harmless -- just unaware that a woman bussing alone at night might be uncomfortable with a male stranger trying to engage in conversation. Fellas -- pretend, please, just for a second, that you're a just-shy-of-5-foot-tall, 120 lb. woman bussing alone at night. A strange man starts asking where you went to school, where you work, where you live. How would you feel?